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Politically Correct Dictionary #1

A-L This dictionary will keep you out of trouble.



Actor: metamorphosing being, possessing great wealth

Actress: metamorphosing being, possessing great wealth (and occasionally great beauty)

Android: bipedal, non-human associate, bearing immense knowledge and skill

Bag boy: agricultural product organizer

Bald: follicularly challenged

Bomb: vertically deployed antipersonnel device

Boy: oppressor-to-be

Brainwashing: cognitive accommodation

Cafeteria: dining facility

Car: earth-unfriendly, vertically-challenged mode of transport

Car Wash Worker: vehicle-appearance specialist

Cat: quadruped non-human associate

Cheating: cooperative assignment

Computer: machine bearing immense power and fallibility

Criticism: unjust self-esteem reducer

Dead: metabolically challenged

Demand: propose strongly

Derision: nontraditional praise

Dirty Old Man: sexually focused, chronologically gifted individual

Dumb: cerebrally challenged

Evil: niceness deprived

Exercise: body enhancement through exertion

Failure: non-traditional success

Fart: human ozone depletor; ecologically incorrect expression

Fat: horizontally challenged: person of substance

Garbage collector: sanitation engineer

Gas Station Attendant: petroleum transfer technician

Girl: pre-woman

Guess: anomaly maneuvers: repetitive predictions

Handicapped: physically challenged

Heroine: hera

Homeless person: residentially flexible individual

Hurricane: himmicane (non sexist)

Ignorant: factually unencumbered

Incorrect: alternative answer

Individualism: uncooperative spirit

Information: overly structured trivia

Insane: reality challenged

Kill: creating a permanent state of metabolic dormancy; servicing the target (military)

Lazy: motivationally dispossessed

Lost: locationally disadvantaged