The Purple DonutOne fine day, a young boy is listening to the radio. He has very bad reception but through the static, he catches something about a purple donut.
His curiosity sparked, he meanders over to his mother and said, "Momma, what's a purple donut?" She then gets this wild look in her eye, grabs a bat and begins to vigorously beat the boy. She yells, "Get your ass to school, and when you get home you're going to the cellar!"
So he walks to school. He has a bloody nose and a battered body but he's tough - so he walks into class. The teacher sees him and says, "Young man, what happened to you??" "Well, I asked my mom what a purple donut was and she beat me with a bat! By the way, what IS a purple donut?" At this point the teacher gets a wild look in his eyes, and proceeds to start beating the boy in front of all the other students. The teacher yells, "You get your sorry butt to the principal's office, now!"
The boy now with an achy back and a bloody nose goes to the principal’s office. The principal says, "Good gracious, child, what in all that is holy has happened to you?" The boy says, "I was beaten for asking a simple question, ‘what is a purple donut?’"
The principal gets a wild look in his eye and proceeds to hammer the kid with a stapler and screams, "Boy - get out of here! You’re expelled from school!" So now the kid leaves with a bloody nose, an achy back, bruises, and five staples embedded in his forehead. On the way home he meets a hobo.
The hobo asks, "Young man, what on earth happened to you?" "Well sir, I got beaten by my mother, thrown on a desk by my teacher, and stapled by the principal - all for asking the same question: What in the world is a purple donut??"
The hobo gets a wild look in his eye and proceeds to beat the boy with a golf club that he used for a cane. The boy escapes with two black eyes.
Now as he is headed home, bruised beyond recognition, he sees a donut shop. "That's where I’ll go! They sell donuts, so they should know what a purple donut is!" He begins to cross the road and WHAM! He gets run over by a city bus.
The moral of the story: Look both ways when crossing the street. Always!