Puns 6

Atheism is a non-prophet organization. (thanks to George Daughters)

Because of the tsunami in Japan, the Chinese are hoarding soy sauce. So I guess you shouldn't Kikkoman when he's down.

An Indian chief had three wives. The first wife slept on cowhide, the second wife a deerhide and the third on hippopotamus hide. The first gave birth to a baby boy, the second to a baby girl and the third had twins - a boy and a girl. Looking at what happened, the old chief declared, "The squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sum of the squaws on the other two hides!"

Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' (thanks to George Daughters)

The man who survived both pepper spray and mustard gas is now well seasoned. (thanks to Jordan Hochmuth)

If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. (thanks to George Daughters)

A former Miss Russia has been arrested for both shoplifting and counterfeiting. Police say she can't get her bearings straight.

Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?

I gave my pet bird a haircut, now he thinks he's James Bond. He's certainly a shorn canary. (thanks to Jonco)

I once tried drawing Bill Murray on a one dollar bill but switched to drawing Jude Law. That didn’t work either so I gave up. Washington makes it too hard to turn a Bill into a Law. (thanks to reddit)

There was a scare in the Middle East when famous political figure, Ali Ali was hospitalized because of a dangerously high amount of toxins in his bloodstream. After 5 hours of surgery and blood transfusions, everything is all right now because he is Ali Ali, toxin free. (thanks to Jordan Hochmuth)